Happy belated Mother’s Day to the all the mamas out there! Thank you for all you do, for The Hand That Rocks the Cradle Rules the World (Wallace).
The Hand that Rocks the Cradle Rules the World. This is a phrase that often comes to mind when I am teaching my students about attachment and the power of the mother in an child’s life, and the power that mothers have over all of the culture. However, for many moms today this power comes with much worry. The world is upside down and sometimes our footing feels pretty unstable. We fight for all babies to be safe in the womb even before conception. Once we conceive we worry about every morsel that passes our lip and try to filter the conflicting advice about what is good for us and our growing babies, or not. Then we have to make a birth plan, do we have a peaceful birth at home, do we take the epidural in the hospital, or something else altogether? But remember it must be just right! Then parenting “advice” comes from all sides. From “the experts”, our friends, our in laws, our own mothers and sisters, even the stranger in the store has some tidbit of wisdom for us. And that is all before our precious babies are just a few weeks old! The worries that moms take on last from cradle to grave because being a mom never stops.
Being a mom comes with great power indeed, but also so much responsibility. We as moms take that all to heart and we worry.
Sadly, sometimes that worry takes over and we are unable to enjoy the wonder of motherhood, the wonder of our children, and the messy beauty of family life. If you are a mom that worries too much, if your worry is robbing you of your joy consider these three things:
- Are you trying to control too much? We have power and responsibility to be sure, but we are not God. There are a million things we would talk about here but in your heart you know, without having to think too hard about it, if you are trying to control too much.
- Are you caring for your marriage and allowing your husband to be your partner? This is both about your marriage – it should come first because a healthy, intimate, joyful marriage will do your kids more good than anything else you can do for them, and about allowing your husband to parent, to do household tasks, and to simply approach life differently than you might.
- Are you taking appropriate care of yourself? It is important to eat nutritious meals and snacks, exercise, sleep 8-10 hours per night (yes, 8-10 hours!), take at least a little bit of time each day to be alone to be silent to pray, read, or think, and take time to have fun! Deeply drink from and truly enjoy some of the licit pleasures that God gives us in this beautiful, created, sensory world.
If you worry too much think about how you can take hold of it, or better yet, surrender your worries. We are not designed to be anxious, distressed, worried, or ill at ease. This is not what we were created for. This is not what God created you for! God created you first and foremost for eternal union and happiness with him, but along the way to that you are meant to be at peace.
Maybe this all sounds great but you cannot imagine a life without worry, or think you could not get there on your own. If you need help reach out. Reach out to your husband, your mom, your girlfriend, your aunt, or if you need some assistance along the way from a more neutral party call a good counselor. I work with women who worry too much, and I work with couples who want to put their marriage first.
William Ross Wallace (1819-1881)
THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE IS
THE HAND THAT RULES THE WORLD.
BLESSINGS on the hand of women!
Angels guard its strength and grace.
In the palace, cottage, hovel,
Oh, no matter where the place;
Would that never storms assailed it,
Rainbows ever gently curled,
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.
Infancy’s the tender fountain,
Power may with beauty flow,
Mothers first to guide the streamlets,
From them souls unresting grow—
Grow on for the good or evil,
Sunshine streamed or evil hurled,
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.
Woman, how divine your mission,
Here upon our natal sod;
Keep—oh, keep the young heart open
Always to the breath of God!
All true trophies of the ages
Are from mother-love impearled,
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.
Blessings on the hand of women!
Fathers, sons, and daughters cry,
And the sacred song is mingled
With the worship in the sky—
Mingles where no tempest darkens,
Rainbows evermore are hurled;
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.
The above poem can be found in:
- Northrop, H.D. Beautiful Gems of Thought and Sentiment. Boston, MA: The Colins-Patten Co., 1890.
Reference:
http://www.potw.org/archive/potw391.html